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Surviving as A Single Mother

Being a single parent is definitely not easy. Let's hear what this single mother has to say about her journey.
Article by Chong Siew Zhen
     In Malaysia, single parenting is not an uncommon family setting. They are many single mothers in Malaysia who are facing challenges in raising their children on their own. They often feel helpless, loss and despair in their life. Josephine Khoo, 44, who takes care of her daughter on her own for the past 14 years shared her experience as a single mother to us at FamilyTies. 
     “I started to raise my daughter on my own after divorcing my former husband in 2007. After I got custody of my daughter, I started to learn how to become a good mother, and how to take care of her well”, she said.
     The journey of being a single mother is more difficult than we think. We do not know how to be a mother unless we are. No School teaches us the knowledge about how to take care our children. Of course, being a single mother is harder than that.     
     Josephine learned from zero. She found a job as an assistant teacher in a kindergarten. She knows that the economic capacity is the basic to raise her daughter. Without any one of the economic source, she is shouldering the living expenses of two people. Luckily, she had a good boss who help her a lot in her life. 
     Other than economic pressure, a single mother also faces mental stress which includes feeling inferior, negative and helpless. Josephine too went through this stage. She use to feel pathetic and troubled by negative emotions from the beginning, her low self-esteem however changed because of her daughter as She has high expectations for her daughter. During those times she and her daughter often quarreled, and Josephine would even scold her daughter. 
     “Mental health is important but often ignored by single mothers. Please ask for help if you notice that you are facing unstable emotions as your mental health is affecting your child. I know that it could be difficult for us to tell others about our misfortune but please, think about your child. Don’t try to put down your self-esteem, as there are a lot of people around you who loves you, who is ready to help you”, she said.
     The journey of being a single mother is definitely difficult. There may be lots of setbacks, challenges, and struggle But remember you are not alone. You have the best gift in the world which is your child. 
As Josephine said, how would you feel if your child were to give up? Don’t give up, there is always hope when we move on.
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Josephine and her daughter Angel. PHOTO Josephine
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